Monday, August 23, 2010

The End of The Piniella Era

Well another Cubs season is in the proverbial dumpster and another legend of the game has been sent packing with his tail between his legs. Remember back four years ago when Sweet Lou sneered at the idea of a curse in Chicago. I wonder what he really thinks now.

Although I am not a spiritual individual, some spiritual phenomena are just too empirically present to be ignored. I do believe there is a curse over the Chicago Cubs. I believe they are cursed to be run by organizations and individuals who know what running a business is all about. The Cubs are cursed to have had ownership that does to fans what a good magician does to an audience in Vegas, they create an illusion that they care about winning and then magically lift the wallets of the fans. Great act.

I don't blame anyone who owns a corporation from doing what they are supposed to do; make money. Judging from the recent sale price of the Cubs, I would say the past few owners did pretty well for themselves in generating a healthy income stream while escalating the price of the product to where it could be sold for a hefty profit to boobs like Tom Ricketts and his family.

The Ricketts family apparently had to mortgage the ranch to afford the Cubs and now must be wondering what it is exactly they bought. I'm sure they didn't foresee the debacle of 2010 and the possibility that next year's revenues might take a hit. I'm sure they didn't count on star players getting old and tanking or a manager who gave up a third of the way into the season.

So the Ricketts family will do what good business people do. They will cut payroll, cut expenses and try to raise the cost of everything they sell to the fans including tickets. The only hope fans have is that the Ricketts family will not be so good at misdirection and illusion. Maybe just maybe the fans will stop streaming to the ballpark like sheep and start to demand a better product. I cringe every time I hear about Wrigley Field being this baseball cathedral. That decrepit, relic of a ballpark should have been razed two decades ago. But, the sheep keep coming back, buying into the illusion that Wrigley is something special, when in fact it is one of the worst ballparks in the major leagues. Have these people even noticed what they built for the fans in Minnesota? Minnesota for goodness sakes!

I hope I'm wrong, but I doubt it. I see a long stretch here where the Cubs will devolve into an abysmal product in their decaying shrine. The only winner in all this is Sweet Lou, he doesn't have to be here to see it anymore.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Blago-Sphere

So now that Rock'in Rod through the use of excellent lawyers and reality TV has delayed the inevitable for about six months we are forced to be subjected to more Blago news and commentary than we ever wanted to hear. If the jury was asked to vote unanimously if they wanted this guy to just go away and never be heard from again, I think that could have been a no-brainer. Too bad they can't indict him for something that calls for purgatory as a punishment.

At best, Blago is an incompetent fool who married the boss's daughter, pissed off the boss and then managed to make a mess of things all by himself for himself and those around him. For all his protestations that the feds couldn't prove anything, it certainly wasn't for lack of Blago's best efforts to commit crimes. What Blago should be more thankful for is the fact that he is abysmal at playing the political fund raising game. Perhaps had he allowed himself to be mentored by someone like, oh say, Michael Madigan, he would now be facing a lifetime behind bars. I say this because people like Blago, dumb criminals, always get caught because they are criminals, but not good enough criminals, like, oh say, Michael Madigan, who apparently the feds feel is reincarnation of Everett Dirksen. Ever wonder why they never indict the big fish like Madigan and Daley?

I suspect that part of the reason why the jury got hung up is because we in Illinois and Chicago, in particular, have gotten numb to political corruption. It's just become something that is accepted because it has gone on for so long, like the Cubs losing. Through all the prosecutions, no matter how many politicians get put behind bars, the beat goes on and we just keep buying our season tickets. Chicago and Illinois are not unique when it comes to corruption, but, I must say, we have to be in the top five.

In reading and listening about the Blago case, I have been one of many who foresaw that the feds didn't have dry powder in their cartridges. They brought a case that was weak; there was no smoking gun, no quid pro quo. Once again, not for lack of Rod's best efforts to extort folks. Maybe if they would have waited a bit there would have been more to go on, but one senses that the word came down to close the curtain on the Blago show before bigger fish would need to be fried. So the feds indict, arrest, prosecute and lose. They lose, in large part, because some the witnesses they had against Blago, who they didn't call to the stand, probably had more to say than they wanted to hear under cross-examination. They probably won't lose a second time. Even a blind squirrel can find a nut, especially if the squirrel has unlimited resources. The feds are the casino, the house. They seldom lose and if they do they just keep you coming back for the next game, ala John Gotti.

There are no winners in all this. It seems no matter how many indictments there are, corruption never ends. When cops get into movies for free by showing their badge, we are all doomed. At some point the question needs to be asked, "do we really want corruption to end?" When so many people in this state have gotten jobs by "knowing somebody" or when businesses can get some advantage by writing a check to the right guy, maybe nothing is ever going to change. There is a school of thought that says sometimes corrupt governments work more efficiently than non-corrupt governments. Why go through all those messy zoning hearings when you can hire Madigan's law firm and get the skids greased? Just good business; efficient business. Some thirty years ago, lawyers were allowed to "tip" the clerks that worked for the county and city. I'll tell you, you never saw such good service. Try to get something done down there now without waiting in line while the glacier moves.

Are we all willing to go the zero tolerance route? Is that even possible? Anyone out there have the first stone in hand to throw? The reality is that when people decry corruption what they are really saying is that they are a nobody. There's a saying in Washington that you are either at the table or on the menu. The vast majority of the people of the state of Illinois are on the menu with no hope of even being the special of the day. We are appetizers at best. As ever, the rich, the powerful, the elite get the best seats, at the best tables, at the best restaurants in town and the appetizers sit back and wonder, what if? As long as voters are willing to be eaten raw by the big shots, nothing will ever change in Illinois or in Washington or in politics.

A friend of mine was pulled over for speeding last week. She asked me if it is normal for the police officer to accept cash for the fine. I told her she inadvertently had jumped off the menu and sat at the table for a brief shining moment.



Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Of Snake Oil and Weight Loss

Valerie Bertinelli is a seemingly very nice women, a decent comedic actress, an admitted drug abuser and the product of a failed marriage that involved infidelity on the part of both parties. She is also the spokesperson for a large weight loss company. Ms. Bertinelli has parlayed her recent public weight loss odyssey into a role on a new sitcom and ubiquitous appearances on talk shows and magazine covers. Ms. Bertinelli is also a shameless shill for a weight loss program that studies show offers little hope to its customers. Now the weight loss company has enlisted the aid of George Costanza to bolster the Bertinelli message apparently fearing another Kirstie Alley debacle.

At first glance I guess I have to question the wisdom of employing a loser/drug abuser and an actor who portrayed one of the most neurotic sit com characters in recent memory to sell products and services to consumers; consumers who are in dire need of medically and psychologically sound advice on how to improve their health. But, in rethinking this whole strategy, I guess it makes a lot of sense.

There is an insidious logic to the weight loss game. The average consumer who is in need of weight loss doesn't really want real solutions. What these average consumers want is false hope and magic acts. They will willingly buy into any message that sells one on the premise that weight loss can be easy and without sacrifice or pain. The reality of why people get fat and the difficult road that lies before them to lose the fat is just too painful for most people to accept. So, why not use sitcom actors to sell them the entertainment they desire. I'm surprised they don't include a laugh track.

Once one cuts through the malaise of what the billion dollar weight loss industry has become it becomes apparent that nothing much has changed, from a scientific/medical perspective about what works and what doesn't. All the goofy exercise machines on infomercials and all the phony diet drugs and supplements work for the people that sell them, but have little impact on resolving the issues of the people that buy them. The real solutions lie within each one of us, not on late night infomercials.

Some people are born to be fat. Some people have genetic/biochemical components to their makeup that imprison them in a body of fat for life. Unfortunately, there is little hope for a three hundred fifty pound adult who was a one-hundred eighty pound third grader. These are the people who have to accept their fate and make the best of it. I had a good friend in college that fit into this category. He spent years and wasted thousands on surgeries, supplement, gadgets and pills over the thirty five years I have known him and he is still a fat adult and will die a fat adult, hopefully a fat old man.

Then there are the rest. Most of us where thin at some point in our lives. Despite growing up in a family where food was plentiful, I managed to stay thin until my middle years. I stayed thin because as a child I played sports and rode a bicycle about ten miles a day to the park, to my friends houses and to the store for my mother. I spent every day at the park. I played sports in high school, in college and beyond. As an adult I continued to visit gyms on a regular basis, took up jogging and still lift weights several times a week. During my adulthood I have had my lapses. I have gained and lost the same twenty pounds of body fat about four dozen times mostly due to my love of food and alcohol. However, whenever the clothes didn't fit just right, I knew it was time to cut down on my eating and ramp up the exercise.

I consider myself fortunate in this regard. I have always had a large portion of self-respect and ego dating to my days as a star athlete and chick magnet. I have considered myself worthy of good care and a hard strong body. I can relate many instances of falls, car crashes and other sundry accidents where I walked away unscathed, thanks to my conditioning. My ego is my cushion of safety.

The majority of the adult population in America is not me. I don't say this to come off as arrogant. I say this to illustrate a point. When a person abuses themselves it is because there is something they don't like about themselves. It could be unfulfilled aspirations, bad relationships, poor career choices, etc. So this underlying regret is assuaged by the consumption of food, alcohol, drugs, excessive sex, excessive shopping, you name it. In psychology these are called immature defense mechanisms. We attempt to defend ourselves from reality by resorting to instant gratification. The cycle repeats itself over and over again, with the regret overcoming the happiness in each instance. This behavior becomes a destructive pattern that is ingrained in our brains and our behavior. Some have an epiphany. A heart attack, a divorce, the fat photo at the cousin's wedding, any number of things can trigger an urge toward change. They may act on this, but unless and until the core issues are resolved, they are doomed to failure.

The basics for losing weight (when I say weight I mean body fat) haven't changed much over the years from a purely biological perspective. To lose weight one must consume less calories than they use for an extended period of time. The devil however, as they say, is in the details. In order to effect any kind of perceptible change in body fat one needs to drastically reduce caloric intake. The body reacts to the lack of food, by slowing the metabolism and learning to live on low calories. There are folks in the third world who do quite well on five hundred calories a day. The body also stimulates the impulse to find food and eat. This is why most low calorie diets last for about two weeks when cannibalism becomes a viable option. Hunger is a cruel mistress.

What about exercise? Gyms are happy to sell you on the concept that you can lose weight through exercise. The problem is that unless you are running marathons the modicum level of exercise that is required to lose body weight is seldom attained if one doesn't alter their consumption of calories while training.

So one would assume that if you combine diet and exercise the objective could be achieved. The only problem here is that with increased exercise the body requires more, not less calories. A thirty minute sojourn on a treadmill while ingesting a twelve hundred calorie complement of food only produces severe hunger and fatigue. One is then left with the prospect of leaving the gym, returning home to the couch and diving into a bowl of potato chips to fight starvation.

So now you have the bad news. Want some more? Losing weight is very, very, very difficult. First of all, dieting is hard in and of itself. Second, getting the right advice and training about diet and exercise is just about impossible given the current state of affairs in the diet and exercise biz. If you think that kid with the on-line $40 personal trainer certificate at the gym knows anything about losing weight, guess again. You can always read Bob Greene's books, but if he couldn't help Oprah, is he really the guy you want to listen to? What about those berries from Africa? I had someone on a blog recommend a book to me written by some guy talking about good calories and bad calories who almost won a literary prize. I didn't realize calories could be personified.

What I know about weight loss and exercise is what I know to be true. I know it is true because I see it work. I will add a caveat here.....it only works for those people who are truly motivated to effect change in their lives and that isn't very many people. Serious weight loss is about diet, exercise and behavioral therapy. These three components overlap and interact in this process and cannot succeed without the others. I have very specific ideas about diet and what needs to be done to lose body fat. I have very specific ideas about exercise, because I was an ACE personal trainer and lived in gyms half my life training and watching elite athletes train. I have very specific ideas about behavioral therapy and how individual behavior can be modified and changed. Nothing easy here. Let me give you a taste, no pun intended. Nobody, and I mean nobody, is going to be successful at losing weight, unless they make aggressive drastic changes in their behavior starting with day one. Nobody is going to lose weight and keep it off unless they are willing to examine their lives and correct the issues that underlie the abuse. Nobody is going to lose weight and keep the weight off unless they are willing to make being in shape and healthy a lifestyle.


Ready for some good news. The initial process doesn't take as long as you would think. I'm talking about losing 5-8 pounds a week. The exercise component is not difficult. At the outset it is very benign and doesn't require a bunch of equipment or a gym membership. The behavioral therapy is something that will make a difference in most every area of your life.

Stay tuned for particulars.